Maybe he will live, maybe his wing will heal, maybe I will find redemption in his perfect little being. Maybe none of the above will happen. But I do know he wants to live. I have never cared so long for a hummingbird, except for one that was a tiny baby and you can read about that experience here.
This is Grigio and I am obsessed with his eyelashes. I never realized hummingbirds have them. He does. They make me melt with love. They move my soul. They are why I didn’t listen to the ‘experts’ and did what I wanted to do to help this young hummingbird. His eyes with those tiny eyelashes.
He was dead yesterday when I went to his cage in the morning. I am serious. He was dead. I pulled his lifeless body out from behind his little nest. He was on his back, legs in the air. He was not living anymore. I stroked his head. I told him he was a fighter, and then I detected a small movement. I was sure I was imagining it. I put his tiny beak to the feeder and he moved again. I knew he was coming back to life. One minute more and he would be gone, along with the hope that I attached to him. I will admit he means more to me than I can explain: but I will try.
To me Grigio represents a part of me that will never give up. He is me, I am him. He continues to live despite all the odds. I am like that myself. I am thriving despite the obstacles that are in my way.
I thrive despite the sadness of my past, I thrive from the lessons I have learned from life, I thrive from the delicate balance of life I have lived and the life of my future. I thrive despite all that is thrown at me. Just as Grigio continues to flourish. I do too. It is not something I think about, nor does he. It just is who I am. I am a fighter, so is he. Perhaps, this is a message to me from beyond. I believe in signs.
Grigio is pervasive, he is right there by me in the morning..he is my sign to fight for what I want to achieve. He is my symbol of life and perseverance. He is my light at the end of the tunnel, he is what I believe to be real. He is a miracle. I want to be a miracle to myself. Maybe, just maybe he will be that for me.