Sometimes, when I look at this ring, my heart hurts, but I feel joy from those same memories on other days. It is the ring I gave Misha when she was four years old with her birthstone, a garnet, and tiny diamond chips. I remember her delight in having a ‘big girl ring’ and how much she loved it. I found it in a jewelry box left behind after her death. I was surprised it fit my finger, yet my mom had tiny hands, and I do too.
From this same jewelry box are gold earrings that I wear with hearts. I feel closer to her when I have something of hers touching my skin now that she is gone. She had a lot of beautiful jewelry that went missing after her death. Her roommates took her things. It caused me distress because I knew that it was a robbery. I had one say to me that she has the cross that was given to her at her first communion, again with the same birthstones, and I have seen photos of her wearing it. I was so broken at the time of her death I didn’t fight for her things and accepted these thefts. But now I wish I had them to give to my granddaughter; her baby was two years old when she died.
Amaya is 16 now. I wish a lot of things for her. I wish I had the wedding dress I married Misha’s father in. I wish I had saved more of my designer clothes for Amaya. I wish I had the christening gown I gave Misha when she was pregnant. I bought it in Ireland. These things are gone, and I don’t know where.
My mother was so good at saving things for me. I have my old Barbies and even a Skipper and Ken doll. They are worn from use as I let everyone play with them through the years. I have albums of pictures in the basement, yet I have not looked at them for years. I want to organize them, but the hurt comes back, and I suppress it by not sorting through everything. Someday I will. I know that I have a lot to say, and I need to put all of my blogs together into a book.
Old things bring back memories, and memories bring back sadness, which causes me to stifle my feelings. I know I will someday sit here and write everything down—every feeling, every memory, all of my simple thoughts, my complicated thoughts—everything. It will be cathartic. It will be an autobiography and a memorial, all in one book. It will be years of my life coming together, represented by many old things that are left behind.
Mother’s Day brings me to a dark place where I feel incomplete because Misha isn’t here. I will start putting all of my blogs together soon. I will have a name for my book: She Left to Begin Again. I will describe how I have found peace in Colombia while telling my and Misha’s stories together. I promise that is on my agenda. While I am wearing her old things, I wish she was still here with me.
Sometimes, when I look at this ring, my heart hurts, but I feel joy from those same memories on other days. It is the ring I gave Misha when she was four years old with her birthstone, a garnet, and tiny diamond chips. I remember her delight in having a ‘big girl ring’ and how much she loved it. I found it in a jewelry box left behind after her death. I was surprised it fit my finger, yet my mom had tiny hands, and I do too.
From this same jewelry box are gold earrings that I wear with hearts. I feel closer to her when I have something of hers touching my skin now that she is gone. She had a lot of beautiful jewelry that went missing after her death. Her roommates took her things. It caused me distress because I knew that it was a robbery. I had one say to me that she has the cross that was given to her at her first communion, again with the same birthstones, and I have seen photos of her wearing it. I was so broken at the time of her death I didn’t fight for her things and accepted these thefts. But now I wish I had them to give to my granddaughter; her baby was two years old when she died.
Amaya is 16 now. I wish a lot of things for her. I wish I had the wedding dress I married Misha’s father in. I wish I had saved more of my designer clothes for Amaya. I wish I had the christening gown I gave Misha when she was pregnant. I bought it in Ireland. These things are gone, and I don’t know where.
My mother was so good at saving things for me. I have my old Barbies and even a Skipper and Ken doll. They are worn from use as I let everyone play with them through the years. I have albums of pictures in the basement, yet I have not looked at them for years. I want to organize them, but the hurt comes back, and I suppress it by not sorting through everything. Someday I will. I know that I have a lot to say, and I need to put all of my blogs together into a book.
Old things bring back memories, and memories bring back sadness, which causes me to stifle my feelings. I know I will someday sit here and write everything down—every feeling, every memory, all of my simple thoughts, my complicated thoughts—everything. It will be cathartic. It will be an autobiography and a memorial, all in one book. It will be years of my life coming together, represented by many old things that are left behind.
Mother’s Day brings me to a dark place where I feel incomplete because Misha isn’t here. I will start putting all of my blogs together soon. I will have a name for my book: She Left to Begin Again. I will describe how I have found peace in Colombia while telling my and Misha’s stories together. I promise that is on my agenda. While I am wearing her old things, I wish she was still here with me.
I have been trying to sit down and write a blog since December about the highlights of the year 2023. I haven’t had the time, as my business has never been so busy as in the past year. It is a blessing and a curse. I have no time to relax and do what I love the most: writing. My business is officially big here in Colombia. I am featured on Google as number one in the Valle del Cauca when you google Glamping or hotels; I never advertise except by my own reels featured on my Instagram, TikTok*, and Facebook* stories. Yet I keep climbing the Google algorithms. I say this with the utmost awe. I never saw this happening when I expanded my business in 2022 and opened my two Glamping cabins.
Many guests return to my place more than once and I have made some close friends. A young couple, Kevin and Katherine, have become my Colombian family. We spent Christmas together. My son had to be in the United States during Christmastime, and spending the holiday with Kath and Kevin was comforting as I missed my son CJ so much. We played games, cooked, relaxed, and relished this special time of year. My friend Vince, a pilot for Copa, returned with his family for a second time. He brought me an Argentinian wine that was super! Another friend, Omer, returned after the New Year and brought his parents from Amsterdam. We started a tournament with the game Rumicube. I do love to play games. Memories of times in the Smoky Mountains of Tennessee return to me when I play board games. Colombians are big on playing games, and I have many to choose from at my Glamping place. My best friend in Colombia, Alvaro, came over with his American family and a beautiful gift of hanging solar lights hummingbirds! I have solar twinkling lights all over my property that light up at night. This gift is unique, and I can remember my dear friends every night when I enjoy it. Another lovely guest made a catalog of ten pages about my business. It has all the information necessary for anyone who makes a reservation at my place. I send the link when someone has questions; it saves me so much time! Other guests often share ideas I should have thought of myself and didn’t. I now have little mini bars and snacks in the two cabanas. People can use the beers, soft drinks, and snacks and pay when they check out. You would think I would have known to do this as I spent so much time in hotels as a flight attendant!
Last year, we had a definite change in the climate at my Glamping business here in Colombia. It rained so much in 2022 that we thought we would never see the sun again. The new year brought the sun to us here in the Andes Mountains, so much sun that we forgot we did not have it the year before. We were grateful when it rained! My Avacodo tree made fruit, and flowers bloomed that I didn’t know I had. The distinct temperature change continues into this new year of 2024 and is quite shocking. I even see mangoes grow on my mango trees. The temperature consistently averaged around 74 degrees during the day, and now it averages 80 degrees here. In direct sunlight, it can actually feel hot. Because of this shift in temperature, I made changes around my property. More areas give shade, including a new roof over my big patio area with games, lounge chairs, and a hammock. I am constantly updating my place with improvements. I just finished a new walkway and revised some of my gardens. I organized my laundry area, updated my outdoor kitchen, and added a beautiful firepit that my guests love to grill and cook San Cocho, a favorite Colombian meal. The climate makes no difference to the bookings at my retreat. People love nature, and they love the beautiful sounds of the birds sharing the rustling breeze and the cool temperatures at night. Not to mention the incredible views of the mountains and the Valle del Cauca seen from every angle here.
Now, for the most fantastic news: I am featured in a docuseries by international Award-Winning Author, Filmmaker, and Empowerment Specialist Toneal M. Jackson* called “I Survived it ALL.” I am one of the women who share their story in the Death segment. The premiere date for my part of the docuseries is March 1st. This docuseries will include stories from myself and other women about Death, Discrimination, Depression., Domestic Violence, and Devastation. The premiere date for my part of the docuseries is March 1st. When Toneal contacted me last year and asked me to participate in her documentary, I said yes. I recorded my part in April. I look forward to the premiere and trust Toneal in her artistic ability to tell my story of grief and gratitude. I will say this, it has been a long journey of healing for me. Some days I wake up and embrace my surroundings, other days I wake up and miss what could have been if Misha had not died. It is a forever part of my personality. I hope that by sharing my thoughts in this docuseries I will help others who have lost a child, grandchild, family member, friend suddenly and without warning. It is something I have accepted and live with day to day. I do the best I can to live my best life while honoring the memory of Misha. I know she would love that I have shared my journey on film and a rememberance of her. The title is so apt because anyone who has lost a loved one knows to keep living is to be a survivor. Feel free to share your own experiences with grief in the comments below. I would love to hear how you have overcome the obstacles that you faced.
If you would like to buy a ticket for any of the series the schedule is on the photo below. I can get a ticket for you, and you don’t have to go to Chicago. I will have a private link on YouTube for anyone who wants to see my survival story, or any of the others that are offered. Please contact me here or on any of my social media sites below.
Facebook: @Michele Huffman Carson or Glamping at Villa Migelita Ecolodge, Colombia
TikTok: @villamigelitacristalcasa
Instagram: @villamigelita-cristalhouse
LinkedIn: @Michele Carson
You can follow Toneal on YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter.
@MyNameIsToneal
Booking.com awards
Kath and KevinAlvaro and familyThe docuseries schedule
I have always preferred the mountains to the beach. The mountains are alive and listening to their surroundings. They hurt and show torment when they are not treated with respect, just like we do as humans. I remember vacations as a young child, traveling with my family to see the mountains by car. I was even stung by yellow jackets sliding down a cliff when I was fifteen. That was not a pleasant experience, but it did not diminish my love of the mountains. Nature is present and alive on the hills. I spent every summer with my children in the mountains as they grew up. Now, I live in the Andes Mountains of Colombia. I am surrounded and immersed in their presence.
Recently, an investor group bought a farm nearby in my village of El Meson. They destroyed the mountain by building a small road without adequate plans or an engineer to design a road without harm to the trees and terrain. It was quite a shock to the residents here, including myself. One day, we have perfect crystal clear water; the next, mud comes through our faucets. I, of course, panicked. I have reservations into 2024, people who cannot wait to stay in the beauty of the Andes Mountains. I had to find a quick solution to the contaminated water. A water filter was designed and installed at great expense to me, and I have submitted the bill to the owners who have damaged the mountain. But what’s worse is what he did to the mountain and the nature that lived there. We have bears, panthers, possums, armadillos, small monkeys, and so many birds it is impossible to say how many species. He sent them looking for a new habitat. For me, this is devastating. I am still at a loss as to why the CVC of Colombia, which cares for our water and nature, has allowed this. My community has finally sent in a lawsuit. I am still determining what will happen from that, but I want to make it known on my blog.
The water in my Hotel and Glamping business is crystal clear again, but not for my neighbors. I am hoping someone reading this will step in to help them. They do not have money to install water filters, and they should not have to. I am unsure how to progress on this, but I would like to know if one of you reading my blog in Colombia knows a lawyer or agency that can stop this devastation and destruction and restore the right to clean water. It is a law in Colombia, but from what I have seen so far, there appears to be no one who will help them. An elementary school now needs clean water to cook or serve the children juice from this same water. It is a travesty for everyone including older people and those who have no voice.
The mountains are hurting around me in El Meson. I feel the pain in my soul.
Your life without a computer: what does it look like?
Recently my computer crashed, and I had to take it for repairs. It was old, but I loved it and hoped I didn’t have to buy a new one. I learned I needed it to write comfortably and quickly to change settings on certain apps like booking.com or Airbnb. I discovered I could get by for a few weeks without it, but I was delighted to have it back, newly updated. I need it for my Glamping business, and I had problems without it.
Did I miss it daily? No, I didn’t. I use my phone much more than my computer. I make short videos and can even use my phone to write, but it takes work. I love a keyboard to type on. I can answer emails on my phone, too.
During the time without my computer, I spent less time in my office. I even closed the door early most days. I exercised a little more, relaxed a bit longer, and loved being out of the office.
Every week is ideal because I wake up to the sounds of birds. Research has shown that their songs and calls are restorative. No matter any minor annoyance thrown my way, I only need to hear a Venezuelan Turpial singing to make me pause and listen.
Some of my weeks are filled every day with guests, days that don’t allow me to spend time writing. It’s a pastime I enjoy. When I have a few days to myself, appreciate my views, the natural sounds surrounding me at my Villa, and time to write my thoughts down, that is an ideal week.
After all, people pay me to enjoy my Glamping place, Villa Migelita Ecolodge, so I should enjoy it also. One needs to appreciate what they have, and I can when I have a few days where I am able to stop for a while and listen to the beautiful sounds from all the birds who live at my lodge and share with others my thoughts.
What daily habit do you do that improves your quality of life?
Hummingbirds are my favorite interaction during my days here at Villa Migelita Ecolodge. These lovely little beasts who regularly fight each other to claim a feeder at my glamping place. I can never tire of their antics. They are solitary birds living alone; they mate, and the female does everything after that alone. She takes care of the babies for about three weeks and sends them on their way. Hopefully, they survive. As a person with a lot of interaction with hummingbirds, they definitely have obstacles when they are released by mom. They have to learn to survive alone because they are on their own after their mother cares for them!
I always thought hummingbirds were wild and didn’t interact with humans, but this is untrue. I spend much of my day re-filling feeders. I have had several hummingbirds become really tame with me. One followed me into the house last year. He became used to my guests, and I named him Magic. He would be the first to drink from the hand feeders. One day, he was very slow, and he landed on the hand feeders and stayed for long periods. I was concerned because he acted ill. I didn’t see him after that, I think he left this Earth.
There is Ruby who is always buzzing my head. She has been here for over three years.
The cover photo is a sweet fledgling I rescued today. He flew away after resting with me. I love Yoga, but the hummingbirds always make me smile.
Scour the news for an entirely uninteresting story. Consider how it connects to your life. Write about that.
I read this prompt yesterday, and I had nothing, but because I am an avid news junkie, I wanted to write a post. Today, I was skimming the news, and there was a story I immediately felt a kinship with. A snake lands on this woman’s arm! A hawk attacks! Last year in Colombia, where I live in the Andes Mountains, I had a few encounters with snakes. I know, the horror!!! 2022 was a strange year for our climate here in the mountains. We had only three of four weeks of sun where I live. I didn’t have constant rain, but it was intermittent most days. We had those three weeks, and the snakes came alive. Now, I want to emphasize that I had only seen a snake at my property one time before this year of snake sitings. When I first moved here, there was construction going on. I remember my workers pointing out a coral snake. I was fascinated but not worried. After that one time, I would occasionally see a snake on a hike or while riding a mountain bike. Nothing to cause me any concern.
So about last year, I was told by my employees that snakes love the sun and they will come out of hibernation when the sun is out for days. I remember I was resting, reading a book in the afternoon. I have property cameras and saw my cat Geisha jump in the air on my first-floor balcony. The movement caught my eye, then I saw this vast snake moving through my planters. Cash, my Dogo Argentino, appears next, going crazy, as you can imagine. I felt immediate fear for Cash as he is a hunter, and I certainly didn’t want him to be bitten by a snake. Like a mother bear, I ran downstairs to stop him, but he was immediately gone. I saw him near my fence as this snake approached the other side. I will never forget the snake’s length as it slithered through the holes. Cash was smart enough to leave it alone. My gardener reviewed camera footage, and it was a “good snake” who eats rats, frogs, and small animals (thank God, not my cat), and it was in the boa constrictor family.
My subsequent encounter was a week later! I left my dog’s bowls on top of a closet downstairs and went to feed them. I picked up one to fill with food, and there was a small snake curled asleep under it. I screamed and called my gardener at home. “Come quickly”! I put the bowl back over the snake. This snake was called an Eckes and was very dangerous. I was lucky not to have been bitten. Saulo showed up and had to kill it because we couldn’t risk having it hang around my Villa. Animals are constantly bitten by these snakes in Colombia and lose their lives. Again, thinking of Cash, my Dogo Argentino.
This year we have had nothing but the sun. Now, I know that snakes are around living here in the jungle. The good ones and the bad ones. We have a product that my gardener sprays around the perimeter of my land to keep them away. It works, and when my customers ask me whether I have snakes, I have to tell the truth. They live in the forest, and I have seen them. They are rare, but this is their forest, and I am the intruder. I respect all nature, but I don’t like snakes! My nature retreat is filled with hummingbirds and beautiful tropical birds, but somewhere in the jungle. Snakes do live and sometimes interact with humans; it is scarce, like a lightning strike, but it can happen.
Today a Long-billed Hermit hummingbird entered my office. In Colombia, I live in an open household. My doors and windows open onto covered balconies where hummingbird feeders hang. Hummingbirds often enter my living areas, but just as quickly, they leave through an open window or door. Temperatures range from around 60F to 74F, I don’t need air conditioning living in the Andes Mountains. As my day progressed, I was doing typical activities, such as filling my many hummingbird feeders, and I glanced over at my feeding tables. A beautiful Blue-crowned Mot Mot was eating a banana. I went to set out more bananas and noticed all the flowers that were blooming nearby. I had to stop to cut a beautiful red rose to bring inside.
I finished my morning chores and went upstairs to do Yoga. Listening to the sounds of the birds singing is soothing, especially when practicing Yoga. I could hear the Venezuelan Turpial singing one of its songs. They have five distinct calls and are the only birds singing while it eats. They seem to be so happy all the time. After Yoga, it is time for me to catch up with my emails and bookings at my Ecolodge here in Colombia. I view my hummingbirds and the Valle del Cauca, Colombia from my office window.
I don’t write as often as I should, so I started this blog. That isn’t a typical day for me. I have so much beauty around me that I must write down what is ordinary for me on any given day. I started this blog and went to fill the feeders again. I fill them four to five times daily; around thirteen species visit my place. The cover photo is unique and wasn’t typical when I found two juvenile siblings on the ground. I was able to have them in my hand for around five minutes. I think they thought my palm was the nest they had left. Magical moments are a normal part of my day, and this certainly was one for me.
As the day ends, I am finishing my thoughts about my typical day here in Colombia. I have my two dogs who need to be fed, more hummingbird feeders to fill, and more bananas to set out for the tropical birds, and then I study Spanish for a while. On many days I do all of this and have guests who arrive from around three to five pm. But today was simple, no guests, just me and my lovely nature that I immerse myself in. I couldn’t be happier. The sun is setting, I am watching the sky turn from blue to a shade of orange, and then it is almost dark. The decorative solar fairy lights start to illuminate in the trees and in my gardens, and balconies. All is beautiful and where I want to be on any typical day here in Colombia.
I moved to Colombia 12 years ago, and adjusting to a new country where I could not speak Spanish wasn’t easy. I persevered, and now I am living a life of complete freedom in what can only be described as Paradise. I was determined to make this new life I chose for myself work. I have always been a person who dedicates myself to goals.
I wanted to be a flight attendant when I was very young. I knew it when I took a class trip to Europe as a young girl. I did go to college, but I was only waiting to turn twenty so I could apply for a job as a “stewardess.” I sent two applications to the only airlines that hired young the month I turned twenty. I interviewed with Delta Air Lines and landed in the May 1st class 1978. I had a fantastic career and continue working in Colombia’s hospitality business.
When I settled into my new home in Colombia, I was determined to start a hotel. It started slowly and became a friendly side business after a few years. Then Covid hit the world, and it seemed I was back to square one. I didn’t let it stop me from developing the ideas that my mind entertained during the downtime of a quarantine. I built a couple of cabins and jumped into the Glamping business. It turned out to be a successful venture. Here I am in 2023, struggling to find time to take a vacation. Good thing I live in Paradise!
Hummings from Paradise 