This year has been challenging for many of us. I believe that we grow stronger when we can focus on the positive and let go of the negative. I created a personal space for myself during the difficult months of 2020 and focused on all that I appreciated in the life I have. I started writing little notes when I would come upon myself smiling, laughing, or feeling contentment. I was able to recognize I had so much in my life.
Uncertainty is stressful. I decided to let it go. I am living a life I designed for myself. Once I started writing down my thoughts each day, I was able to determine that my life wasn’t much different during the Pandemic rules than it was before the Covid-19. I have always been a very disciplined person. Lockdown did not make me less so. I still got up in the morning and started my day just like I have always done. It was comforting to know that I had a purpose each day. I have never been much for crowds, so when I would leave my Villa to do my errands, I was always in a hurry to be home again. This didn’t change during the coronavirus restrictions. I felt relief when I didn’t have a lot of pressure to accomplish too much. I had one day a week to get my basic needs. Enjoying six days at Villa Migelita Ecolodge was not a hardship. My beautiful hotel became a place of pleasure I alone could enjoy without the responsibilities that came with the bookings. Sure I missed my guests, but I found comfort with the artistry of nature surrounding me.
Nature fills us with blessings. I became enthralled with the noises and calls that awoke me in the mornings. The Chachalaca birds started waiting for me to put bananas out at the feeding stations. The hummingbirds became my friends. Cleaning their feeders was always part of my daily routine, but it was part of the job when I had my guests here. They are an attraction to many who visit. Alas, now they were just mine to enjoy. I discovered much about how they had accepted me when I alone was enjoying them. They hate when I clean the feeders. They buzz me and are waiting when I refill and hang them again. My parrot Luci revealed so much about herself as she grew into adulthood. I wrote a blog about my decision to give her freedom. She has rewarded me with visits. I watched as the fish in my natural pool grew huge. They love any leftover organics from cooking. I never knew this. They are fat and happy and await the scraps to be thrown to them all day long. My ducks are tame and always following me when I sit by the lake. I had to cut down a large tree because of construction. I used the trunk to make a small Gnome village that feeds the neotropical birds, and children can play in when the guests return. The beauty of nature is resplendent. It gives so much back to us humans.
Animals give us unconditional love. Appreciating them and their company was essential during this unwarranted time in history. I was able to shower my undivided attention on my animals. They gave back their love. It was a love-fest!
Relaxation is essential to our well-being. I realized I could do what I wanted on any given day during the lock-down: “Netflix today, beautiful light for photography, writing a blog, cook a new recipe, clean my curtains, organize my office space, take a nap, have a glass of wine, do Yoga, listen to classical music, appreciate the sunsets, the rainstorms, acknowledging the views surrounding Villa Migelita Ecolodge” my brain was never idle. I felt complete many nights when I drifted off to sleep.
I spent less money. I found out that as a minimalist I had room to learn. I didn’t need as much as I had. I have eliminated some unnecessary costs from my life. I used the money I saved to give back to the community through charity. A friend collected money, farm products not used, and distributed to the poor.
I savored my peace. I missed my choices from before Covid. However, I relished my alone time. I found out I was just fine being with my own company.
My hair grew long, and it wasn’t grey! I now have a healthy head of hair that doesn’t require much upkeep. I don’t need a lot of beauty rituals. I did gain some weight, but I have lost most of it. I like the way I look. I acknowledge my looks. There is no need to go to any extreme to keep current on trends in beauty. I am timeless.
I became close with my son. He had arrived right before Colombia shut down. We were in this together. We grew closer. He learned the bird calls, the names of hummingbirds, to help me clean the hotel, to speak Spanish, to enjoy his own space, to train his puppy Cash, to help me with our aging dog Marley, to enjoy rainy days and sunny days, to look at a full moon, to watch the sunsets with me, and to help me with little things. He is a good son. I lost my daughter , but we were able to share memories of her. There are no words for what we both have discovered.
Health is all we have. I am so grateful to live during this unprecedented time in the country of Colombia. I live in the fresh air, an open home filled with breezes, and no other people surrounding me. My neighbors are near but not too near. We have a beautiful community. We appreciate that we live with a certain amount of freedom from the Pandemic. We still wear masks when we chat over the fence while maintaining social distance. We have our health. I will continue to live a life isolated from crowds until the virus is gone. I can do this. The vaccination should bring the world back to normal in the next year. I have the patience to wait. I will follow the guidelines to keep my health intact.
I suggest to everyone to take a moment and write a list of gratitude. It will bring the best of your world to you. I know we all have bad days, or weeks, maybe months. Take a moment to inhale all that is good. I promise it will bring a smile to your face. Smiles are as good as money, so is joy.
Merry Christmas to all and a Happy New Year filled with new beginnings!-
Waking up in the morning to the sounds of the birds calling at dawn is my favorite alarm. Sometimes it is not even light yet as I hear the parrots overhead calling like a choir singing. I open my eyes and forget that the world is forever changed momentarily. I listen and stretch, and then it enters my mind. Another day of the same routine, except it is getting more stringent again in Colombia because our cases are surging. We have a holiday weekend in Colombia however we are all closed inside. No one can drive anywhere, especially into the mountains where people come to relax from city life to their country homes. Liquor is unavailable as parties are part of the reason for this new surge. It now appears that in Colombia that for so long was holding off the coronavirus is now falling victim to increased cases daily. People here are not following the rules set forth by the government while the virus thrives because of this.
My time is doing much as I did before this pandemic struck so suddenly. I don’t mind being in my Villa with my animals, nature, and the beautiful weather that is year-round here in the Andes Mountains of Colombia. However, I realize that it is a lifestyle I choose because I was surrounded for so many years by people packed inside an airplane, and I love my life of simplicity. I find myself busier than ever because I have to keep this hotel organized and clean. I am no longer hosting guests, who can know if I will in the foreseeable future, and I don’t have the help I once had. I get a day out for essentials, but I don’t enjoy myself because I am worried about contracting the virus. I wear the mask, carry the hand sanitizer, stay distant from others, and I hurry through my errands to get back to my place of peace in the mountains.
As we increase in cases here in Colombia, I am noticing parallels to the United States of non-compliance about such simple things we can all do to alleviate the spread of Covid-19. Wearing a mask is a must. It is proven to keep us safer and possibly eliminating the risk of contracting the virus altogether. In Colombia, we have rules to follow if a business is allowed to be open. As of now, hotels are not available, and flights are not operating due to the pandemic. Restaurants can deliver, or we can pick up food, but no one can enter an establishment. To shop, we have to show our country ID to the guard at the entrance, have our temperature checked, a photo of our ID, hand-sanitizer, and walk on mats to clean our shoes. These stringent measures were working until the parties started on the weekends, and the bicyclists started not wearing masks while exercising. Selfishness, impatience to return to our old lifestyle, and non-compliance are causing others to die.
Etiquette is having the decency to respect the lives of others. Every single day I see on my various social sites that someone I know has become infected. Some of these people would post pictures of themselves without masks, with others having fun without social distancing, and being deliberately defiant to the guidelines that are proven by scientists and doctors to correspond with mitigating the virus. Those of you who support these dangerous conspiracy theories are the reason the cases are surging. Do you want the world economy to crash? There are simple directives for us all to follow. I cannot understand anyone who deliberately risks their own life as well as the lives of others for any reason. The virus is apolitical. It doesn’t care who you vote for, what your lot in life is, whether you believe in these stupid conspiracy theories, and will strike without a thought if you surround yourself with someone who is a carrier. Remember, there is no way of knowing if someone has the virus until it is too late, then you have it.
Young people are particularly affected by these new guidelines that keep them so confined. My son is here with me in Colombia. He just told me that he is beginning to understand the true meaning of patience. He has been stuck in my Villa for over three months without leaving. I can’t bring him with me on errands as Colombian rules specify one person per nuclear family is allowed out on our designated days. He is learning Spanish, he is playing with his dog Cash, and the other dogs. He has learned the names of many hummingbirds and Neotropical birds, and chats with my neighbors from across the fence. I explained to him three months is not a long time. It feels that way to us right now. We all have issues with the continuous monotony of our daily lives during the pandemic. I miss making appointments that are needed to have my teeth cleaned, or to see a doctor because I have a pain in my shoulder. I can get an order for an x-ray without a problem by phone. However, I prefer to wait until it is less risky. I can get my teeth cleaned, but this can wait until the virus is gone. We need to have a mindset of compliance for the better good of our society, for the world economy, for future generations.
So I ask all of you who follow my blog to follow the guidelines put forth by the experts, the doctors, the scientists, they know what they are saying is the only thing that can bring back our world from the brink of disaster. We have been in lockdown in Colombia since March. If we look at this amount of days compared with our entire existence, it is not that much time. Toleration is tantamount to getting back to what we once knew. I implore everyone to turn off those sketchy conspiracy theories in your mind, to listen to the experts, to contribute to getting our world back to a place we can live comfortably, and interact with others again. We might not have our old lives back in the same way we once did, but we can certainly obtain a good existence that will guarantee our children and grandchildren will have a future.
If you haven’t signed up for my blog you can click on follow in the sidebar and add your email. My last blog was about letting my sweet parrot Luci have her freedom. We all desire freedom, nature shows us patience. Luci returns almost every day to say hello, and little by little she brings more parrots with her. She has found her flock but still remembers the love and care I gave her. Let’s give each other love and care during a difficult time in all of our lives. Some of us more than others are suffering disproportionally. Let us show empathy, let us show concern by honoring those we care about. Even if it means sacrificing some of your freedoms.
The state of being free or at liberty rather than in confinement or under physical restraint.
Luci was free, but I cut her wings. I have had her since she was 3 months old, she had turned 6 years old this past April. I had noticed Luci was finding spots in the ground to try to lay eggs, which Luci could not produce. She was restless, she was damaging anything that she could, my outdoor bathroom doorframe, the cement on the wall surrounding the frame, and then she went up inside my new washing machine and chewed up cables. There went that warranty! I decided to let her wings grow. This is the last video I have of her enjoying a rain shower. You can see her wings which are almost fully grown. She had a boyfriend who came to visit almost every single day and called to her. She called back, but she couldn’t go to him. I decided she needed to be with him. I worried that she would not know how to eat in the wild. I hoped if her wings grew in and she flew off she would find her happiness and her novio could teach her what to eat in the wild. I struggled with my decision as I loved Luci like I love all of my animals, and I know she loved me back.
When Luci was a juvenile and had all of her colors
Luci started to fly recently. She flew low so I worried about my decision. We would find her almost every single day in a weird spot. She would call out for me which I would follow, find her, and bring her back to her perching area. She would enter her cage, which is always open to sleep for the night. This past Wednesday, she called for me, and I couldn’t find her. I looked everywhere. She called but with all the beautiful plants she blends in. She slept outside for the night.
Thursday morning I listened for her. I was hoping she was still at my Villa. She didn’t disappoint and called. I couldn’t find her. She was further away, her sound was distant. I knew she was higher in a tree. When the workers who are installing a new fence at Villa Migelita Ecolodge arrived I asked them to listen for Luci. She called again and one of them found her high up in a fruit tree. They ran to get the ladder, but alas Luci is smart and knew she would no longer have freedom. She flew off and down. I watched as she entered my neighbor’s yard. She would never be found now. We looked and we called her. She didn’t answer. It was around 8:30 am and I hear her boyfriend in the same tree he is always in. I talked to him and said Luci was gone. I was in tears, to be honest. I know I had prepared myself, but I wasn’t ready to say goodbye like this. He squawked and squawked. Then I heard a squawk from far away in the corner of my property. It was Luci answering! He flew away immediately.
In my wildest dreams, I felt he was going to meet up with her. I wanted to believe this. I went to sleep that night telling myself this happened. I awoke and told my gardener when he arrived about what had happened. Everyone told me she would be fine, the companion will teach her to eat and we have plenty of food in Colombia for parrots. I was so sad all day, I went to rest and I hear her calling. “Luci is back my inner voice said to me!” She was and she was high in a tree on my other neighbor’s property. I called for her and she just watched. She remained in the tree. My heart was full because I realized she could fly high up and she was alive. Then yesterday my son called me, she was in the same tree with her sweetheart. She had called to show us that she is around and happy.
This morning I was up early feeding the dogs and I heard her. She was calling again, and I see her land right next to my property line with her companion. They were grooming each other. I walked over and I stood directly under the tree. They both looked down at me as Luci did a little twirl. I called her name and she cocked her head. I said I was happy she is free. I stood there and watched for around 2 minutes and then they flew away together.
To be free is something that we humans are missing right now. We are confined, we are given rules we don’t like, we are not sure about what the future will bring. Nature can give all of us a perspective on this. Luci certainly has taught me an important lesson. Sometimes, patience is necessary in life to achieve our goals. Luci communicated to me her needs, I listened. One day she may bring her babies back to Villa Migelita. I do know she loves me as she keeps showing up to see me. It might end, she could migrate, but I will know she has found her happiness.
I wish all of my followers happiness and peace during this turbulent time in the world. We need to find our peace, within ourselves, during such an undetermined world of complete and utter chaos. Nature can show this to us. The animal kingdom is so patient. They are wise and communicate their needs without being so utterly selfish. They are compliant and wait for what they want. I am missing my Luci. My heart aches when I see her cage which I am leaving open in case she wants to come back. I know in my heart she has found her peace. I wish that to all of you who follow my blog. Find your peace and live your peace.
I wrote a blog many years ago about becoming minimalist. It was one of the most popular blogs I have ever written. During this time of isolation, you can change your habits. Why not organize your house (and your life) and get rid of all the stuff you have taking up space? I can guarantee the feelings of being in charge of your living area will free up so much time for all those things that are on your wish list. Why not change your diet to healthy foods, try to drink more water, and eliminate sugar? Minimalism is not just about living simply, it is about living healthy, learning to live without depending on social media, constant cable news, going out to just get out. Learn to be happy with yourself and your own company. I have found no real difference in my life since I have been in quarantine because I always would leave my Villa very early when I had errands so I could get home as soon as I could. I want to be in my home, and in the tranquility, it provides me and my spirit.
I have a very large Villa. It is a hotel, but with the novel coronavirus, it is now just my home. I don’t have maids anymore, I am responsible to keep it clean and in good condition in hopes that I will return to my business soon. In Colombia, we are not in the same position as other countries dealing with this Pandemic. Colombia, the country started to restrict activity at an accelerated speed. Thus, we have a much smaller amount of the disease than other countries. Colombia also has the best-rated health care system in Latin America and is rated number 22 in the world as having a preeminent health protection system above the United States and many other wealthier countries. Many people who were here on vacation when the coronavirus struck have extended their tourist Visa to stay longer, and they are trying to obtain a longer Visa to live here. The reason I bring this up is that moving to Colombia is how I became a minimalist. When you leave your country of birth and move to another country all advice given by experts is to get rid of everything except the most special memories and buy anew. I did this with great difficulty, but I have yet to regret my decision or my lifestyle change.
The steps to becoming more organized in your life are to start with getting rid of all the excess baggage hanging around in your mind first. Start with a routine. Routine is the actualization of becoming a minimalistic person. I start my day the same way every morning. I am sure many of us do. However, then we get sidetracked, distracted, or overwhelmed with what seems to be too much to do to get our lives and homes as we want them to be. Routine is key to minimalism. The most important part of your routine is to have a clean, well-maintained home. To have a home that is simple to maintain is to get rid of excess. It is just that simple. I suggest that you go room to room and look at what bothers you in each place. Make a list and start slowly. If you try to tackle too much you will become disillusioned and you will quit. Now is the perfect time to start the process while you are staying at home to be safe from the virus.
There is much to say about being a real minimalist. It progresses through little steps. I will continue my blogs each week with more advice on how to continue to a well-organized home and mind. With a simple home, your mind becomes less cluttered just as your home will. You will sleep better, and find you have more time for things that you do but feel guilty about because you know you should be cleaning up your office, or organizing your kitchen. I have no excess food in my house, even during this time in isolation. I buy what I need because I know what I need. I know how much toilet paper I use in a month, I don’t have canned foods, and I hardly ever eat out. It is less expensive and it is also healthy. We control our lives, our lives don’t control us!
Let me know what you think of my first blog about becoming minimalist in the comments. Sign up by email so you never miss a blog. In the comments please write what is hard for you to achieve, questions, and if you have any suggestions for others that can help them get to a place of peace that only an organized life can give you.
Some musings from the year 2018 and how I have found patience to be my most valued possession. The year 2018 started off so wonderfully as I was leaving 2017 with success in my business and starting with customers in January. I had new-found independence. I was pleased with the way my Spanish was improving after two men who worked with me had left and I was able to start working with Jazmin. I actually felt comfortable in my home for the first time in years. Working with Jazmin in my business and having her as my assistant, along with her family as a support system totally changed my life.
Then, out of the blue, I was sued by the man I had been working with here in Colombia. He had already been given a liquidation amount for his time working at Villa Migelita Ecolodge. In Colombia, apparently it is OK to sign off on a liquidation agreement as a paid employee, but then sue me again for 1/2 of my Villa. I had paid him a lot of money already and now I had to hire a lawyer to fight this ridiculous lawsuit. In the meantime, I had hired another man to work with me. He left without notice and broke his contract. The first man who was suing me had not done any work with my customers or on the farm for over two years and was just living here, even though I had asked him to move out. I fired him with the help of the second man and a lieutentant of police here in Colombia. I will always appreciate them, and I didn’t mind the second man breaking his contract as this forced me to change myself and my attitude of needing help with driving, translating, and dependence on others. The first man lost the lawsuit and was forced to pay court fees, and he also had to pay me for some of his things left at my house for over a year and a half. So out of this situation I found self-sufficiency.
I began chatting with my son again this year. I have found it very frustrating that through many attempts to make peace with my son, my ex-husband has found a way to hide truth from me and sabotage our relationship. My son who is an adult now also has to accept responsibility for keeping things from me, and he is old enough to know that I have always been a good mother, and someone who has his back. We were supposed to go on a cruise together in March, I even trusted his word enough to buy tickets for this cruise which he cancelled on me out of the blue. This cruise was the beginning of another bad episode. I brought my very best friend of many years with me on the cruise and met lovely people and enjoyed all three days. Before the cruise I spent a week with my grandchild. She was different also. Before when I would visit she was a delight and filled with joy and happiness. This time she was very withdrawn, quiet and even had an episode of extreme sadness and anger, asking why she couldn’t go with me on the cruise, who did she belong to and more. I had no answers as her other family told me they didn’t have her birth certificate, which I offered to get for Amaya. It is quite simple. I was then told they didn’t know her social security number, nor did they have papers for who had custody of her. In other words, they lied to me. They also didn’t tell me they gave Amaya away to a family Misha knew from her school years. Yes, I found this out later. I didn’t realize it is legal to just give a child away. It is in Florida. It is not legal to collect my daughter’s social security death benefits and not use them for Amaya, which they are explicitly meant to go to. I found this out also.
I met someone on the cruise the very last night and he seemed quite nice. He knew my friend from high school so I gave him more trust than I usually would with a new man. I realize now this friend new he was a con man, a loser and someone who doesn’t even have his own home. He was living at my friend’s house which he said was temporary because they needed help with a hotel they own on Hollywood beach. I visited with my friend and had no reason to believe anything was untrue as my friend didn’t tell me that he was in dire straights and they were helping him out. He came to visit me here in Colombia and brought gifts, paid for everything we did, and was quite charming. I had no reason to believe he was after me because of my hotel or what he assumed I had. I made plans to visit Amaya in June and see him again. My plans to see Amaya were thwarted. I was not allowed access to my granddaughter and this man put me in the hotel on Hollywood beach in a tiny little room and said he would upgrade to another room as soon as it was ready. I was miserable. I live in a mansion here in Colombia. This room was about the same size as my office here. The internet was spotty and I was sad to be in the same State as my granddaughter and not be able to see her. I also didn’t have a car because this con man was supposed to let me use his. I was very unhappy and cried for a day off and on. He dumped me, thank God! However, I stayed in Florida and rented a car and lived at different places waiting to hear from my lawyer about an emergency hearing in front of a judge, which did not take place. So I spent money I didn’t have, and it was a total disaster. Including seeing my son, which was not a great encounter either. As I am trying to find positivity in everything that happened this year, I will say that living in Colombia is the best thing I have ever done for myself. I am at peace here and I have many great friends and my business is fun also. I meet new people and enjoy new friendships.
Meanwhile, through all of this drama I found out I had a rare condition called CAM in both hips and would need surgery. I had to live in Cali, Colombia for one month after the surgery and I lost a lot of business because I was unavailable during the best months of August and September. I also had to do therapy full-time and could not participate in the many activities we offer at Villa Migelita Ecolodge. I have great insurance here, and I didn’t have a lot of medical expenses, but I did have to pay for two households. I had Jazmin with me in Cali and I had her sister staying at my place in the mountains. To say I was thinking about that disastrous trip to Florida and the unnecessary money I spent is an understatement. The positive part about my surgery is this: I am completely healed, I had the wonderful support of my friends and of Jazmin and her family, and I can now participate in all activities offered at my hotel. I find that my clients like for me to accompany them, which I really enjoy also.
I had to also have a lot of work done on my Villa this year, more hits financially. When I returned to my Villa I was so happy to be back but was still dealing with the work being done and doing my physical therapy. However, I found myself enjoying my life so much because that short time I lived in Cali, Colombia made me appreciate how peaceful my Villa is, along with being a perfect temperature year round. I found myself relishing my time writing, watching my hummingbirds, Neotropical birds and enjoying the cool breezes that pervade throughout the house. I end the year feeling exhausted from having no contact with my granddaughter, the people who have her don’t let her call me, nor does Amaya have a phone number I can reach her at. I have been speaking regularly with my son, and I was feeling positive about that, but that ended recently when my ex-husband became involved. My son was supposed to come here and live for a while. I was really happy about that. Then I had a phone call with my ex and he gave me a list of demands that CJ needed, and frankly I found this quite absurd because my son is a grown adult and in our conversations we had discussed some things he would like and I would be able to accommodate him with them. I had also discussed how we live here in Colombia. We live quietly and peacefully. We live normal hours of going to bed at night at decent times, and getting up in the morning at normal hours. We are a place of order. Even the dogs know their schedules. I explained this to CJ and he was fine with that. I wanted him to start college online and would give him some outdoor chores that my gardener would oversee. I tried to explain to my ex-husband how to get a Visa for CJ so I could put him on my health insurance. I also asked if I could send Amaya a Christmas gift to his house as I am unable to communicate with her anymore. This is when it got ugly. My ex used Amaya as a way to blackmail me and to make me listen to his demands. I am no longer married to him, nor do I approve of the way he has raised CJ. He did the same thing with CJ when we divorced, it is called parental alienation. He is doing this with Amaya now. He knows she was given away, he is the executor of her estate, so he knows that Amaya is not getting the death benefits of our daughter Misha. He should be concerned about this, and he should take action that the money is used for Amaya only. So he ended hanging up on me, my son will no longer talk with me again, and I don’t know if my granddaughter received her Christmas gift which I know arrived at their home.
So I have decided Amaya will someday contact me when she has control over her life. She must be so sad that she is not chatting with me. I can’t imagine what is going on in her mind if adults are saying bad things about me. It is so damaging psychologically. I know this because it was done to my son. Many think I abandoned my son because that is what my ex husband said to everyone, it is not true. Now my granddaughter who has loved and adored me is being kept from me. Living in Colombia has made me realize that even when I am super sad, I can find joy in the little things around me. I am starting the New Year off with a houseful of guests here at Villa Migelita Ecolodge . I am busy, my hips are healed and I have Jazmin and her family as my family. Sometimes, we just have to accept the bad things people do to us and get on with our lives. That is what I have done since my daughter died. I am filled with joy every single day because we have a sweet new puppy Kira. She has been a light in the darkness that has followed me this year.
Kira has learned quickly because my other dogs are seniors. She follows their examples, and therefore is quite calm. She sits when they sit, she sleeps with Orion when he sleeps. She eats when they eat, and is quite orderly with learning potty training. She has really surpassed all my expectations of bringing a baby into the house with older dogs. The one who accepted her unconditionally was Orion. The others have followed suit because Orion is teaching her to be calm. She has been disciplined by the other two dogs a few times and has learned to not wake them up, bite them and to sit quietly by them if she wants them to be her friends. She is an exceptionally intelligent dog, her breed is Dogo Argentino. She goes places with all of us here at Villa Migelita Ecolodge. She is leash trained and loves attention from everyone.
Kira sleeping with Orion
Orion plays with her, and is so gentle. He has taken her as his own. I am so overjoyed by this, because he is 9 years old and I wanted him to train her to be just like him. She even follows him out when he barks at noises. She is learning from a pro! He is the most patient and loving father Kira could have.
So I end this year with jubilance in my heart. I have let go of the difficult year of 2018 and have a good plan for my future in 2019. I am going to let go and let be. I have learned since the death of my daughter and even the years before her death, we can only control ourselves. What others do is their decision. We all have free will. I choose to be kind, peaceful, and forever hopeful to have my relationship returned to normal with my beloved granddaughter and my son. Amaya cannot control her situation, but someday she will be able to. She will have all of our many memories made together during my times with her. She will never forget them, even if others tell her differently. I believe my son has all those memories in his heart too. I know he knows the truth about what happened during my divorce and Misha’s death. I will be covering all of that in my upcoming book. I will leave nothing out. I am going to write it down for both my son and my granddaughter. If they have been told one thing by me it is to never lie, to be strong and to show people who you are by the way you live your life. I live my life now that I am free of a bad marriage in a way that exemplifies who I am. I am transparent and without any kind of subterfuge. I want to share this with everyone. I want my lifestyle to show who I am. The unacceptable actions of others are theirs to bear.
I wish everyone who follows my blog a very Happy New Year 2019. I wish for all who have had a bad year to begin anew, just like I am going to do. Leave the past behind and head into the future with love and peace in your hearts.